


Three Quarters A Couple

by orphan_account



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Alternate Universe - Monster Falls, Animal Death, Bill's a hunter, Cussing, Deerper, M/M, Swearing, Will's a taxidermist so, bill n will are twins, but with a twist, except also his family are deers so, guns/firearms mention, not the first fanfic I've ever written, sorta monster falls, this is my first work I'm posting online, though the stans are only briefly mentioned, you'll see - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-08-08
Updated: 2015-10-13
Packaged: 2018-04-13 16:27:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 9,855
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4528947
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dipper had originally planned to stay with Wendy for the hunting season like he always did. A fever that caused him to stay behind to get well might have caused much more than just being late...<br/>Bill Cipher considers himself an expert in hunting and relishes every animal he brings down. His brother worries about the animals' suffering far too much, and presses Bill to use extreme caution when hunting. Bill usually brushes him off, but maybe just once, he should listen. Might finally get Will off his back, at least.<br/>(Summaries will be the end of me. -PW)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Introductions

**Author's Note:**

> To any who care, I actually panicked on choosing the name title because I initially just dubbed it as "Howdy" (as a joke) as I was planning to save it to drafts for later thought before accidentally publishing it, haha. I'll probably change it again as time goes on :P

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the cheesy opening! I started this a while ago and didn't feel like rewriting the first chapter. It gets better I swear, bear with me haha

            Bill hummed, almost giddily, at the wheel. He was on his way back in his pickup truck from yet another successful hunting trip. Originally, he had merely planned to bag a deer per request of his taxidermist twin brother, Will. It was a normal routine of his to go out and hum serenely while animals dropped before his unyielding rifle. It was one of Bill’s favorite hobbies, in fact. He would gladly accept requests from his brother, whether it be a rabbit or a buck, a raccoon or a bear. But tonight was a little...off-center, one could say.

            Tonight, Bill had bagged a deer-boy.

 

* * *

 

 

            _Dipper waved good-bye to his sister dramatically and sarcastically one last time before turning and leaping off into the woods. Hunting season was upon them, and Dipper was headed out. Usually, he, with his family, would help tear down the makeshift village of their small tribe before heading off deeper into more magical territory to wait out the season in safety. The fairies there were more than happy to have them as their company, but the deerfolk had to admit that they were less accustomed to talking trees and flying, sparkling lights that followed them around all day like bugs._

_Recently, though, Dipper had begun making a journal. In it, he would document everything he could find out about humans. Dipper couldn’t help himself; their culture was just so strange and interesting. He could use the information to learn more about human habits and teach them to his fellow cervitaurs, while adding yet more fuel to his burning curiosity._

_Dipper bounded lightly along, jerking his jacket tighter against the wind while his packs bounced against his flanks. Tucked into his jacket was his trusty journal that he always brought with him on the yearly outing. This year, he was a few days late, since he had suddenly developed a quick fever and had to stay inside for a while, but now he was back on track and headed for his good friend Wendy’s house._

_Dipper smiled. Wendy was a wonderful friend, someone he had known for a while. She was the first human Dipper had ever met, and Dipper was likewise to her, being a cervitaur. They made a rather odd alliance, but he was happy to spend time with the redhead._

_Wendy_. 

He woke with a start.

Dipper felt cramped and very, very cold. His legs were stiff from lying awkwardly for so long, crumpled up beneath him. Dipper shifted, groaned, and peeked his eyes open.

He was surrounded by mesh fencing on four sides, while something covered the fence from the outside, leaving his optics to adjust hastily to the dark. The ground seemed like human plastic that had several, worn scratches on it. In one corner was a faded couch cushion. He couldn’t locate any entrances or exits, except one wall did have a gate-looking opening in it that, unfortunately, was closed.

Dipper pulled himself into a sitting position and rubbed his head, wincing at his soreness. No broken bones, no stinging sensations of pain anywhere, from what Dipper could tell. He was too sleep-fuddled to realize his current situation, so he allowed himself to just sit there and think about the chain of events.

_Okay...okay. I was going to see Wendy. I had my journal and everything._ Dipper suddenly started and twisted to look over his shoulder. His packs were gone. _Did someone take them? Did I drop them? No, wait, focus. I was on my usual track, but I was a few days late…I was running…something weird happened and I took off and heard something chasing me and then-_

Dipper suddenly realized with a jolt what he had forgotten. _I WAS SHOT!_ Wildly, Dipper jumped up, only to waver about on wobbly knees before sinking back to the ground. His heart rate spiked as he raked his gaze over every inch of his body, searching for a bullet hole. He should clearly be feeling it, why wasn’t he feeling it? But maybe he was too in a hyperactive state to be feeling anything right now? _There_. He spotted a dried patch of blood that had trickled down his hindquarters a little whiles before drying where it sat. Upon closer inspection, Dipper immediately recognized the hole to be non-fatal and relaxed. Partially.

It stung when Dipper poked at it, but it didn’t seem to be much more than a scratch. Was he shot with a BB gun or something? Again, Dipper tried to stand up, but held onto the fencing this time. He was able to grudgingly stay upright if he leaned against the mesh. Dipper looked around his surroundings again.

The gate had blended nicely in with the surrounding wire, but really, it was just a door disguised with the same materials as the walls. There was a latch with a heavy padlock on the other side. Dipper tried it, to no avail. He was locked in. In the time he was given, Dipper tried everything to escape. He kicked at the fencing. Rattled the lock of the door. He even threw the couch cushion at it in frustration. Nothing worked.

Glumly, Dipper admitted defeat and took up a lonely position on the floor again. The cushion reeked of cat piss but no matter how uninviting and cold the floor was, it was perpetually better than that peeling, old thing. He squeezed his eyes shut tight, and sighed deeply. What had he gotten himself into? It must've been well into hunting season and he knew he should’ve stayed with Mabel for the winter when that dumb fever delayed him. Dipper thought of home as exhaustion overtook him and he finally drifted off to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How does one forget they were shot
> 
> I considered wrapping the first two chapters together since they were so short, but later decided against it. thanks for reading it so far!


	2. Heyyy, Brother?

“ _I beg your pardon_?”

The Cipher twins were sitting in their garage, hunched over a table littered with bones. Currently, the brothers were helping each other out with a small taxidermist project. Bill, the seemingly less interested of their work of the two, was leaning forward on his arms with a smug expression. Will, on the other hand, looked horrified underneath his safety goggles.

“That’s right, buddy. In the flesh, in the backyard, right now, as we speak,” Bill went on. “I swear, I thought he was just a really unfortunate deer. But it turns out he was just a rather _fortunate_ fellow to fall in the path of my gun.”

Will grabbed his brother’s arm with a gloved hand. “Please tell me you didn’t actually _shoot_ shoot him.”

Bill swatted sibling’s hand away. “Relax, short stack. I used your damn safety darts. He’s sleeping like a baby in the doghouse. I even threw in some of the old couch cushions because I know you just get ‘ _oh so distressed_ ’ for the animals.” Bill raised his voice in mock of his brother.

“Animals don’t deserve the pain we cause them, especially if they’re about to… to no longer exist!” Will argued childishly, threading his needle through the bird’s skull one last time before tying the knot and snipping the line. “And besides, _if_ what you tell me is true, and I’ll believe it when I see it, then he’s part human. That means he must have some sort of awareness about what’s going on. That probably could’ve counted as murder, Bill.”

“Oh yeah. Murder of an innocent fantasy creature from deep within the woods. That really oughta get the charges piling.”

“I’m being serious.”

“So am I.”

“Look, Bill,” Will sighed, fighting the urge to pinch the bridge of his nose. “I really don’t care what you did to that creature, as long as you learn a lesson from this. Please don’t start hunting until the season’s well in. It’s barely just started and you’re already rednecking it up out there.”

Bill looked taken aback as he watched his brother start cleaning up the table. “Are you even listening to me? I just caught you the scientific wonder _of a lifetime_ (and _with_ your darts) and you want to start an argument about _gun safety_?” How thick could his brother get?

“Yes, Bill. I want you using darts until I start seeing pickup trucks careen into the forest. Only then will I be satisfied with your strange murdery whims,” Will informed, removing his gloves and goggles before washing his hands.

Bill was really starting to get annoyed now. “An actual cross-species hybrid snoozing like a princess outside, not ten feet from our door _right now_ , and you can’t stop thinking about the _animal’s_ rights?”

“You’re starting to repeat yourself, brother,” Will muttered, shrugging on a coat. “I don’t want to keep talking about this if we’re both just going to get angry. Just show me him already.”

“Maybe I’ll- that’s what I’ll do, you piece of- of crap,” Bill growled, too annoyed at the moment to be coming up with a good retort. “He’s just out here.”

Bill stood up and slapped a button on the wall, which activated the system opening the garage door with several moaning clanks and pops. Oh, sometimes his brother really pushed his buttons! But Bill wasn’t going to let Will’s silly concerns get in the way of his excitement. As much as the deer-boy was for his taxidermist brother, Bill loved a good bit of entertainment as well. He really wanted to get to know this deer-boy and what he was like. Where he came from and if there were others like him.

Having been hearing stories of his cousin Tad’s adventures in the town next over from theirs (some place called Gravity Falls), with this beautiful beast falling right in the middle of Bill’s life, well, Bill was ready to believe any of those stories were true, now. Goblins and vampires and mermaids and multi-headed bears. Maybe the deer was just the beginning of Bill and Will’s very own adventures. A bit of a stretch, sure, but the undeniable fact of this creature’s existence now gave several possible theories to the presence of other such fantastical creatures.

Oh, he could hardly wait!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and it's already starting to get out of character *sigh*
> 
> the next chapter will be longer, i promise c:


	3. First Impressions and Depressions Ensue

_“And the girls can wear bras, but the boys aren’t allowed to?”_

_Dipper was with Wendy. He was lying down on Wendy’s bed, furiously scribbling down notes in his journal as he watched his human friend pick out an outfit to wear for a date. He had overcome his embarrassment of watching her dress by drowning his focus in his studies. It wasn’t hard, after he got into it. He just kept asking questions that led to answers that begged to be questioned again._

_“Well, it’s not exactly illegal for dudes to wear bras. Or bikinis for that matter, I guess. It’s just not what we do, y’know?” Wendy answered, pulling another dress over her head. “What do you think of this one?”_

_“Bikinis?” Dipper asked, chewing on his pen._

_“Girl swimsuits. What girls go swimming in. Pools, lakes, that sort of thing. Humans swim for fun. Don’t you?”_

_“We’d only have the river, even if we_ could _swim. Hooves aren’t exactly duck feet, so we’d easily get swept downstream if we ever tried. Fascinating, though.” Dipper looked up as Wendy snorted, amused._

_“You really think it’s fascinating that we like to go swimming? Can we really be that different? Well, I mean, except for the obvious,” Wendy asked, feigning seriousness. Dipper suddenly felt nervous and entirely self-conscious of his deer body. “You’re a total science nerd.”_

_Dipper allowed himself a smile as he understood and she started laughing at her own obvious joke. “Well, I don’t want to be different. I want to be friends.”_

_Wendy stopped laughing abruptly and looked at Dipper for a moment, just watching the cervitaur with a fond expression. Finally, she moved to her wardrobe and tossed him a gray pullover. “Here, try this on. It’s pretty big on me, so it’ll probably fit you.”_

_Dipper held it, surprised at such a gesture. He stretched it over his head and antlers and stuck his arms through the holes, admiring his first set of clothes given to him by his friend. “Wow, thank you, Wendy, really. This, er, smells like you,” Dipper fumbled, avoiding her gaze by messing with the hoodie’s drawstrings. He heard Wendy chuckle softly and looked up to find her with a different dress on, one that complimented her fiery hair and pale complexion._

_“No problem. Thanks for helping me pick out a dress.”_

* * *

 

Dipper jumped awake at the sound. It was metallic and loud, sounding like metal teeth that grinded steel in its mouth. It came from outside of his enclosure, just to the right, maybe ten, fifteen feet away? He couldn’t tell what was making the noise since the blanket or tarp (or whatever that covering was) was blocking his view. Well, anything that was happening out there, Dipper made sure to keep as still as possible and his eyes on the door, preparing himself for anything that might come bursting in here.

And just as soon as it started, the grinding stopped, and Dipper heard faint voices–human voices, in fact– that were headed his way.

“Why’ve you got the blanket over him?” asked one voice. _Male_ , Dipper noted.

“In case anyone dropped in while we weren’t out here,” replied another, drastically more confident voice. _Also male_. _Hm_.

The tarp was lifted, and evening light illuminated Dipper’s small surroundings. Two shadowy figures blocked the entrance as the lock was turned and the gate unhooked itself from the wall. One of them gasped softly as they saw Dipper and the other one just…grinned. Maniacally.

“He’s awake? You didn’t say he was awake!” whispered the softer-sounding one, fiercely.

“No, but I’m glad he is,” murmured the other, not breaking eye contact with Dipper for even a second. The gate swung open, and the grinning one stepped in.

Without warning, the cervitaur sprang at them, aiming for the open doorway with his head down and antlers forward. Anything caught in the path of his raving animal instincts would be impaled and, if even more unlucky, crushed underneath the impressive weight of his rack. Nothing could stop this beast of nature.

Both gave either a whoop of glee, or a cry of fear – Dipper couldn’t tell which – and slammed the door as one in front of them. The cervitaur clanged into the mesh fencing and stumbled back, winded. He clutched at his head as the men started laughing – maybe weeping? – and did so very loudly. He shook his head to clear it and glared at them, suddenly hating every cruel thing they were responsible for.

“Hahaha, wow, Will! Told you Bambi here packed a killer punch!” remarked the one closest to the cage, slapping his knee and practically guffawing. The other, now as white as a sheet, had backed up several feet and stood quaking in the middle of the yard.

“You didn’t tell me jack squat about that thing!” cried Will from a safe distance. “I didn’t think, well, from what you’ve told me, that it’d already grown in its horns. It could’ve gored you, Bill!”

“With quite an impressive rack, I’m sure,” Bill mumbled, not really paying attention to his brother. He peered in at the tense cervitaur, as if he were nothing more than a strange animal in an exquisite exhibit.

Wendy had warned him. Wendy had warned Dipper that there were humans like this. _Not all are as nice as me_ , she had told him one night as he watched a couple walk down Wendy’s road with their dog yapping at their heels. He had asked Wendy if he could go out and meet them as well before she told him the truth. _Humans are incredibly advanced beings. They weren’t meant to live comfortably with nature, like you do with your folk_ , she had said, gently guiding him away from the window. _I guess you just got lucky with me. I don’t mind as much as other people do_.

 _Mind what_? He had so innocently questioned, all those years ago. _Why couldn’t people and cervitaurs get along as well as you and I do_?

She had stared at Dipper for a long time then, remorse written plainly all over her face. _Eugh, Dipper_? Wendy started, sitting down on the armrest of the couch. _Humans are beasts. They’re so dangerous and bad for you. If they found even one of you, they’d trap you, torture you, then kill you, piece you apart, study your insides before patching your corpse up again and putting it on display. And they wouldn’t stop there. They’d hunt down the remaining cervitaurs, including your family, before they did the same to every single one of you_.

Dipper didn’t believe it at first. Ever-so-wonderfully-brilliant-humans, doing such unimaginable horrors to creatures like him? It sounded so ludicrous. No creature had that kind of power. Then, as the seriousness of the situation sunk in, he was horrified. Wendy gave him the longest hug he had ever received as he stood in shock, stammering. _Humans are that terrible_? He had choked out, hardly even registering the symbol of affection as his mind walked him through each of the events.

 _Yes, Dipper_. _Each and every single one of them. Well_ , she added, backing up and giving him a weak smile. ‘ _Cept for me. I got your back, Dip_.

 _I got your back_.

Those were the last words he was ever going to hear of sweet, wonderful Wendy. _Ugh, so stupid_! Dipper berated himself. This was going exactly how she had predicted it to happen. He was trapped. That was stage one, apparently. Then, according to Wendy, these men were going to torture him until he bled out openly and died on their floor. Even his family had warned him! Dipper must have been in denial then, as his sister and great uncle pleaded him to stay with them for hunting season. He was so transfixed on Wendy and the creativity and intelligence of humans that he hadn’t even bothered to play it safe. Now, here he was, stuck in some stranger’s backyard, and no one would know where he’d perish. Dipper was going to die here, alone.

 _No_ , he thought determinedly to himself as Bill clung to the fence and stared him down almost giddily. _I’m not giving up that easy_. Dipper was going to give these humans one hell of a time if they thought they could crush his spirit just like that.

“So, uh,” Bill went, after a long moment of silence. His smile had faded. He looked almost… _bored_. “Got a name, Bambi?”

Dipper just glared at him.

Will had finally gotten over his nerves and was now pulling nervously on the sleeve of his brother. “You know, Bill, I think it might be best if we leave him alone. He looks pretty worked up, and as we both know, an aggravated animal is a dangerous one.” The two looked at each other then with such an understanding gaze that Dipper suddenly started. _They’re twins_ , he realized, and his stomach lurched. _They are identical twins_.

“You can’t be serious, Will!” Bill whined, pulling away from his slightly younger sibling. “You’re a total _nerd_ for science things and I’m,” whereupon Bill dropped his voice lower, as if he were slightly uncomfortable. “I’m not going to let you pass off on something as huge as this.”

Will snorted and sarcastically and uncharacteristically remarked, “Aw, so you do care.”

Bill looked surprised. “…I mean it!”

“No, Bill, I really don’t think this is a good idea,” Will muttered, averting his gaze and watching Dipper with equal looks of curiosity and wariness. “We don’t even know if it’s a sentient being. Look, let’s make a deal. If it – er, _he_ – isn’t capable of recognizing us as, well, _people_ , then you can have your fun with him before I-I make a sculpture of the animal.” Will stumbled on the last part. He seemed a little upset over the fact that animals have to be dead before they can be stuffed and put on display.

“Oh, for – he’s wearing a _hoodie_!” Bill exclaimed. “That’s gotta be human enough.” He waited, but Will didn’t say anything. Finally, Bill shrugged. “Whatever. Deal. I’m gonna try and break the ice and in the meantime, you can go finish your bird things. I don’t care.”

Will paused, and then sniffed out, “Fine. I can see when I’m not needed,” and hurriedly went away, brushing his sleeve across his face as he did so.

Dipper and Bill stood there for a very long time. They just stood, looking at each other through the wire fence. The one with searing hate in his gaze met cool, steady smugness from the other. It was a quiet standoff, one strangely accepted by both sides. It wasn’t a challenge, but it wasn’t a sign of peace or understanding. They just…watched each other. Observing each other. It was odd.

Eventually, Dipper looked away and turned to the opposite corner of the cage before lying down in a sitting position. “Not gonna talk, huh? Pity,” Bill commented to the cervitaur, who merely flicked an ear in response – though it just seemed to be coincidence to Bill. “I suppose we’re going to play the guessing game, then. I doubt Bambi’s your real name, though it’d be hilarious if it was,” he said before laughing out loud to himself.

Dipper just pressed his ears to the sides of his head and sighed, allowing his expression to collapse now that his face was turned. He really _was_ going to die here. How would Mabel react? Wendy’d probably have to tell them when he didn’t show up one day. Just imagining the look on Mabel’s face when she was told her twin brother was dead nearly made Dipper gag with sorrow. But the cervitaur held strong as Bill continued to talk to him through the fence.

“What about Calvin? Heh, that’s a weird name. Cyal-veen,” mused Bill, stressing the name. “Well, even if it were your name, I doubt I'd call you something as dumb as that. Do deer-people have nature names? Like, Treebark or something? Hey, is your name Treebark? Please say no, because that’s ultimately the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard.”

 _This must be the torture Wendy was talking about_ , thought Dipper as the man cackled, again at his own joke.

“Let’s see. You’ve got brown hair and, I’m assuming, common brown eyes to go along? My brother has a friend with brown hair and eyes named Margaret. Though they aren’t really friends…She’s just one of the more regular customers of his online store. Speaking of which, did you know my brother is a taxidermist? Yeah, he messes with dead animal things in the garage. Like, he skins them, takes out the bones, and cleans ‘em up before sticking them together again. I think, actually, that would make him a crypto-taxidermist? I dunno. He specializes in bones, so that sounds like a proper term. It’s weird. You probably wouldn’t like my brother because of that. I mean with you being an animal and all. I don’t think anyone likes him, actually. Heh, it’s a good thing I’m stuck with him, otherwise he’d be all alone.” Finally, at this, Bill ceased his chatter and leaned against the fencing for a thoughtful moment.

“I can’t really imagine being without my brother,” he said quietly, staring at his dusty, mud-splattered boots. “I can’t see him somewhere that I’m not. I mean, sometimes the guy really gets on my nerves, and sometimes I just can’t stand his dumb, sensitive nature, but…” And at this Bill straightened up suddenly and locked the door, which he had seemingly forgotten to do before now.

“Phew,” he said, pretending to wipe sweat off of his brow. “That was close. Don’t want you getting loose, huh piney?” Bill grinned, but Dipper made no signs of acknowledgement.

“Okay, okay, I’ll explain,” Bill relented. “You’ve got pine needles stuck in that mess you call hair,” he snickered. “If I were you, I’d brush it every now and then. Who knows? You could probably look half-decent with a slight shave and a comb through that mane.”

Dipper still didn’t move. This seemed to annoy the human, because suddenly he sighed and went, “Alright, kid. You got me. I’ll leave you alone. I really hope you’re not just a mindless animal.” Then he just turned away and…left. Walked into the house and closed the garage door, complete with the metal grinding that came with it.

Dipper looked back once the noises had stopped. He self-consciously ran a hand through his hair and indeed found pine needles flying from his skull. How did those get in there? He also ran a hand over his chin, hoping that maybe finally, _finally_ he was growing a beard. Anything? No, still soft as a fawn’s rump. _Damn_. Well, maybe Bill was talking about Dipper’s bangs. They sure could do with a few centimeters off.

But more pressing matters urged Dipper to think differently. Bill had said his brother was a taxidermist. A _crypto_ -taxidermist, to be more exact. If that wasn’t a sinister sounding name, Dipper didn’t know what was. Wendy’s words flashed through his head yet again. “ _Patching your corpse up again before putting it on display_ ,” his memory reminded him, and Dipper involuntarily shivered.

Humans were terrible, awful beasts of nature. Wendy had described all of the people she knew to be so friendly and so sociable and totally not demonic entities that ripped savagely through the forest to hunt down his family. Well, of course there were hunters. They obviously existed and counted as demonic entities. You were going to get, with any civilization you encountered, the bad guys and insane ones and so on. But _all_ of the humans? As absurd as it had sounded, Dipper was starting to readily agree with Wendy’s description of the human race. They were awful, maniacal beings that shouldn’t be trusted.

But then again…Bill had talked so fondly of his twin brother. Will didn’t seem like the type to be shredding the skin off of cervitaurs and fairyfolk. Bill had even described his brother as sensitive…Perhaps Will was like Wendy. Understanding and kind.

But Dipper vigorously shook his head. _No_ , he thought darkly to himself, bringing in his knees and tucking his hooves underneath him for the night. _But nothing, Dipper. Bill said so himself. That Will guy is going to disassemble your insides before piecing you up again as a…a piece of art_.

He sighed. It was going to be a long rest of the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, "exquisite exhibit" was definitely deliberate B-)
> 
> I still want to write at *least* until we start seeing some actual billdip affection coming through, and perhaps some more Cipher-twins character building (characterizing?), but that depends on whether or not I keep being interested in it haha.
> 
> Again, thanks for reading it so far :)


	4. Brotherly Snub

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M SO SORRY that it took a million years to get this chapter out. I kind of got bored with the (originally a) writing doodle and then school started and a bunch of stuff happened and blahh. But yeah! It's finally done and I've got some plans for the next few chaps :)

Bill was on the couch when Will finally came in from the garage. His brother’s face was blotchy from crying and he tried to cover it with an arm as he passed in front of Will to get to the kitchen, but Bill stopped him.

“Look, I’m sorry, okay?” he said, muting the TV. “I just got excited, and, and I wasn’t thinking of how my actions affected others.”

“You got that from a book,” muttered Will. His voice wavered and Bill looked up as he went on. “But it’s fine. It doesn’t matter. Just leave it alone already.”

Bill stood up and held onto his brother’s arm. “No. I made you feel bad and I’m not going to be that shit brother that just denies he ever does anything wrong, Will. I know I might be a little…forward sometimes, like, when I get excited about things. But that doesn’t mean I can go swaggering around, making people feel like crap.”

“That…might’ve been the smartest thing I’ve ever heard you say,” remarked Will, who was still looking away. “But really, it’s _fine_. I was the one who overreacted in the first place, as I often do.”

Bill really hated it when his brother acted like this. Always trying to put the blame on himself. It was so irritating. He reeled his brother in by his arm for a hug and said quietly, “You know I think that’s fine. What _I_ know that _you_ know I don’t like, however, is when you constantly put things on yourself. Loosen up a little, buddy. You know I can’t stay mad at you forever.”

Will was quiet for a moment as they stood there in the living room, illuminated by the TV and each wrapped in the other’s arms. It was the usual apology situation. Bill screws up, Will refuses to acknowledge the matter, Bill loves so sickeningly on his brother, and Will eventually lets the issue go. Bill knew it was his brother’s weakness, to be held like he was for so long. He was a soft little guy that needed constant affirmation that everything was how it should be. That nothing was wrong because everything that happened just had to…you know, _happen_. But Bill didn’t necessarily blame him. It was just the way Will was.

Finally, Bill loosened his grip and his brother pulled away. Nodding, Will murmured, “Yeah, okay,” before retreating into the kitchen with Bill looking forlornly after him. Then Bill felt slightly annoyed.

It was the best he could accomplish! What did his brother expect him to do, just release the animal right then and there? If he were to do that, they’d miss the opportunity of a lifetime!

But Bill knew that wasn’t really why Will was acting so hurt. It seemed his brother wasn’t convinced that Bill actually had any humane tendencies towards animals ( _or_ humans, for that matter). _Fine_ , thought Bill as he watched his brother pour himself a tall glass of cold coffee dejectedly. _Guess I’ll just have to prove to him I’m more than some brash monster devoid of feeling. The apology was only the start_. _Soon we’ll be good pals again and I won’t have to feel like crap_. Then Bill caught himself.

Strange, how such human mechanics drove him to act so out of character. Usually he lived on his own in varying apartments scattered throughout the town, and only crawled to his brother when his pockets turned up empty and needed the free rent. But after a while, Bill really began to care about Will again. He cared about what things happened to him or made him feel bad and he felt all weird and protective. Like it was Bill’s fault if anything ever happened to him. It was undoubtedly the closest he had ever come to sympathy for people (or animals, for that matter. _Explains why I agreed to those darts_ , Bill reflected).

The oldest Cipher twin sat back onto the couch and unmuted the TV, running his hand through his blonde, shaggy hair. _Maybe it’s time I got a haircut_ , he thought as his show returned from commercials, finally dragging his attention back to the screen.

 

* * *

 

 

The rest of the week passed by in agonizingly slow motion. Will blatantly avoided Bill for the entirety of the weekend with only a note to claim he had several deliveries to make to customers across town (which was a ridiculous attempt at an excuse, because Bill knew he always either shipped the pieces or had the clients come pick them up directly). And it wasn’t just that his brother was ignoring him. Bill could handle grudges easily; they came with boasting rights whenever hunting. But the fact that his twin brother would abandon him when something as interesting and spectacular as the fawn-boy sat out in their backyard, just dying to be examined and tested? Come on, Will! You could have at _least_ stuck with him for that!

But it didn’t really matter anyways, since progress with the deer had been null as of late. No matter what Bill did, the cervitaur always ignored him. He had tried talking gently to him, rattling the gate and getting frustrated at him, and even unlocked the gate a few times to try and step all the way in before being given the most searing glare of hatred from the creature Bill had ever received. He let the animal be whenever that happened.

It had been four days since he had first dumped the kid in the crate. Of course, Bill had given him both food and water (he concluded salad and Doritos would be a nice range of options to pick from), and each time he returned to check on the fawn-boy, everything would have been picked clean.

“Phoo-wee!” whistled Bill the first time he saw the overturned bowl and empty bag of chips on the other side of the cage. “You’ve got one heck of an appetite, no doubt about it. Wonder if food could make you talk, y’know, if nothing else works. I mean, if I was the one that was stuck in there with nothing but leaves and chips to sustain my life, I’d be begging for a decent meal by the end of the day, haha!” Bill waited a moment. “But I can see you’re not giving up anytime soon. Guess I’ll just have to be a little more patient...” the hunter said alluringly before promptly marching inside, fixing himself a grilled cheese sandwich, and returning to eat it outside on the back porch to just sit and observe the cervitaur.

But it was day four, and Bill was losing hope.

“I could have downed ten deer by now,” he mentioned to the cervitaur one late evening as he sat leaning against the cage, running his hands down his antique rifle. The deer behind him was sitting with his own back to Bill’s, and staying quiet as ever. “Hunting season’s well in and all I’ve done is sit here and try to figure you out. I won’t say I’m sick of looking at your pretty face, because I could sit and stare at it all day,” chuckled Bill, who didn’t see the fawn behind him suddenly tense. “But my patience is running thin. And if you think you know what it’s like to be frustrated, trust me. You don’t know fury until you see me mad.”

The crunch of Will’s jeep coming up the gravel drive alerted both man and partial man to his arrival. Bill couldn’t see him through the dense trees around the house, but from how fast he heard Will slam the door of his truck and pelt up the front porch and into the house, made him realize he was looking for Bill. Immediately the slightly older twin stood up, said “Excuse me, Bambi,” with a slight smirk, and headed inside, only to run right into his speeding brother.

“Bill!” squeaked his brother in surprise, who had caught him right around the middle. His eyes were shining. “You’ll never believe my good fortune!”

Bill closed the back door before prying his twin off of him. “Good fortune? What?”

Will began to ramble. “Okay, so you know how I was making my deliveries over the weekend because I had a bunch of custom orders that needed to be dropped off? Well, okay, one of them ordered a bunch of deer teeth on a necklace and just to, y’know, make conversation, when I handed them to her I asked, ‘Why deer teeth and not the teeth of, say, a possum?’ I mean, everyone knows possum teeth are much more sharp and terrifying, so why not them? And so we started talking about deer and it turns out she knows a surprising amount of stuff about whitetails. So I sort of hinted we had a bit of a deer problem and she said she could come over and check it out! We’ll have a real expert to help us out, Bill. Isn’t that great?”

It took a moment for the situation to settle in his head. “Wait. Slow down. Are you saying we’re gonna have a stranger who claims to be a wildlife lover in our house?” Bill sputtered. He was horrified. “To look at _Bambi_?”

“Yes,” Will replied, whose expression was becoming slightly more confused than excited. “If that’s what we’re calling him, now. Why are you acting like that?”

Bill, who had begun running his hand through his golden hair repeatedly, paused to look at his brother incredulously. “Because we don’t invite strangers over willy-nilly to come look at the scientifically impossible deer-boy currently living in our backyard, you idiot!” yelled Bill.

Will suddenly shrunk back, hurt. “What– what do you mean?” What was he going on about? Will was being helpful, not a nuisance, like he’s told he usually is. “She was nice enough to offer her assistance, Bill. Maybe you should be grateful,” muttered the younger of the Cipher twins.

It was a bold move, and perhaps a stupid one on Will’s part, to stand up to his brother with that suggestion. But nonetheless it was said, and Bill froze.

“ _Grateful_?” he hissed through clenched teeth. “You think I should be _grateful_ when she comes to haul him away for dissection?”

Now it was Will’s turn to stiffen. “...What?”

“Urrgh, how could you be so stupid!?” Bill groaned. “When she sees that thing in the backyard, she’ll snap as many pictures of him as she can before posting it and everything she knows about us online, where millions of people could take one glance and know exactly where we live and what we were hiding from science. This was our secret, William! Only a nincompoop such as yourself would ever be so– so _naïve_.”

Bill watched as Will’s frightened eyes began to fill with water. _Here we go again_ … thought Bill miserably as his brother stammered to make comprehendible speech.

“I– I just thought– Maybe– I thought that she could–“

“A _stranger_ , Will. Get that through your head, okay? We have no idea if we can trust this lady! We’ll have to play it off. When did you say she was coming again?”

Will took a dramatic sniff and rubbed a sleeve across his nose. “Tomorrow, whenever we– we’re free, or something.”

Bill nodded, already working out a plan. “Alright…okay. We can work with this. It’s not completely botched up, like _usual_. Who knows? Maybe she’ll make a few remarks about deer that we could use. You did say she was a vet, right?”

His brother shrugged.

“Alright, so we can let her in, perhaps tell her a few tales to be polite, and then mention we’ve solved the problem and kick her out. Boom, done.” Bill glanced at his brother again, who pointedly was looking away, obviously feeling afflicted. …And yet he still stood in front of Bill, like a small child ready to receive retribution for having done something wrong. The older twin sighed, shook his head disappointingly. How could Bill be related so closely to something such as him? He sighed again for emphasis and walked away into his room, leaving his sniffling brother in the hallway.

Sure, some would call it cruel. To leave the only family you had in shambles on the living room rug? Most, actually, wouldn’t call that very nice. But Bill didn’t care. He was angry. His brother didn’t ‘make a mistake.’ It almost seemed deliberate, like he was _trying_ to get the word out that there was an anatomically incorrect animal just outside their door. But Bill knew he wasn’t like that. His brother only did things if he thought they’d make a good impression on him. _Will’s like a dog_ , Bill thought sleepily to himself as he got ready for bed. _He’ll do just about anything for stupid praise. And when he goofs up, he acts like he’s just offended the frickin’ god of… of_ life _or something_.

Images of whimpering, sniveling dogs swam through Bill’s head that night. But strangely enough, his dreams were muted from their usual abnormality by soft thoughts of deer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Protect Will he doesn't deserve nasty brother Bill
> 
> Also smol hints of (eventual i know im sorry) billdip B-)))  
> Hey and just in time for Billdip week too haha


	5. Ice Breakers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back in the writing curve! A slight obsession with proving my (lousy, no good) English teacher wrong got me to write quite a lot for the past few weeks. School's also started, so that kind of held me back, but hey I've written a little bit! Thought maybe you've waited long enough. It's not a whole/finished chapter, but I'll just split it this way since I'm not sure how to word the rest of it.  
> Thank you so much for reading!

Dipper was positively _sick_ of Doritos.

He had lost count of the days – each seemed to be more and more cold than the last – and he was starting to feel physically homesick. His lousy hoodie did nothing to stop the chill seeping through the tarp and his miserable attitude only added to the sleepless nights in his living hell. There’s only so much a young cervitaur can endure.

Granted, Bill _had_ been able to keep him _some_ company, however much it reminded the deer-boy of his doomed fate. He was charming, in a strange, sadistic way. The hunter loved to ramble on and on about his terrifying, apocalyptic dreams for the future or maybe how cute he thought it was that his brother played “old-timey music” whenever he was working on a project. Dipper wasn’t quite sure why he always shut up whenever his topic of conversation started to veer towards his brother, though. Bill seemed to like him enough, often commenting on how oddly talented his brother was in the art of poker or a game of chess. But Dipper wasn’t really interested in finding out about the relationship details between the Cipher twins...

He was much more interested in the idea of escape.

During the night hours, when the lights of his captors’ house finally faded to black, Dipper would start working at a corner in the chain-link mesh fencing. Dipper couldn’t risk trying to kick in the fence without the twin imprisoners waking up. So, he began pressing his hands against the wire and leaning on it, hoping for a weak link and a satisfying _pop!_ sound that came with freedom. The wire looked pretty old, and it had certainly been used before (the scratches of other animals having scarred the plastic floor gave hints of previous captives), so maybe it was just a matter of time before one gave away and the rest would follow.

It was the best he could do for now.

What seemed strange to Dipper, though, was the absence of Will. Days had come and gone, but ever since that first night, the cervitaur had seen neither hide nor hair of the blue-haired twin.  He had heard the human, sure, whenever he sang along to his strange music in a loud, clear tone. His workshop seemed to be in the garage (which was another word Dipper came to add to his vocabulary via Bill Cipher), where he worked on his… _art_ …projects.

In all honesty, Dipper had _zero_ idea on what to think of Will Cipher. He seemed a lot less confident in himself next to his brother, and based on the arguments that Dipper could sometimes hear through the closed windows of the Cipher house, he seemed easily prone to breaking down. But Will was also horrifyingly and abnormally in love with dead things, and Dipper couldn’t tell if that counted as a clash of personality or just an added bonus to the eccentric duo that made up the Cipher family.

But his view on Will became much clearer one night as the human willingly came out and just...talked with him. It was a clear, mildly breezy evening and only a sliver of moonlight came in to light up the outside. Dipper had been doing his push-and-rest method, trying on all spots of the cage before eventually coming back to the corner he had been working on (which, wonderfully, had started to grow a noticeable bulge in it), when he spotted the human. He quickly sat down and watched with wide eyes as the man walked up to the gate.

“Hi,” Will said after a long moment. His hands were in his pockets and he looked tired, peering in through the darkness at the area he was pretty sure the deer-boy was in. “Um,” he started again, looking around awkwardly. “I don’t suppose you’d like a light?”

Dipper was surprised. While now perpetually distrustful toward any human who approached him other than his beloved Wendy, his thoughts shifted for a moment. Hearing the Cipher twin refer to him as a being with actual feelings was strange, having been talked to so distantly for the past couple of days.

“I mean, it’s dark in there, and it’s also pretty chilly,” he went on, looking up at the sky. “I don’t know, maybe I’m being dumb again. Sorry about all the avoidance on my part. Um, look, I’m just gonna go...” And he hurriedly turned around to begin walking back to the house.

Dipper knew he wasn’t going to get another chance like this. He was being talked _with_ , not talked _to_ , like Bill loved to do. He was even asked if he were cold and perhaps wanted some company (that was in the subtext, right?). That meant he was at least _trying_ to be hospitable. He nearly let Will go, but quickly, before he got too far away, Dipper abandoned all his stubbornness and threw caution to the wind by speaking up.

“Hey, wait, please?”

Will froze in a comical position with one still leg up in the air. So agonizingly slow was he to turn around that Dipper thought maybe he had suddenly and magically frozen in place, before a shiny eye caught his in the dark. “...Bambi?”

Dipper blushed and brought his eyebrows together. “Uh, my name isn’t Bambi, actually. It’s Dipper. And you’re– it’s Will, right?” He talked fast, just deciding _what the hell_ and going for it while he could. “Yeah, um. The light thing. I’ll take you up on that offer.”

The Cipher had turned around fully now. His arms were wrapped nervously around him and he cast a quick glance over his shoulder at the house light that was still on before walking back to Dipper’s cell.

“So, so you do understand us.” It was a gently surprised statement, though it was clear from his expression that Will was completely shocked. “How long– oh, God, my brother shot you– You’ve been sentient this entire time? I thought my brother was just being silly. I didn’t think– oh my God, I’m so sorry, I–“

Dipper blanked, suddenly feeling guilty, out of all things. “Hey, no, it’s okay! Really, uh, it’s fine.” Wait, what on earth was he talking about? Things were definitely _not fine_ seeing as he was in a cage and they were going to dice up his organs after they murdered him. _And why is Will apologizing?_ Dipper thought to himself as the grown man started blubbering in front of him. It was actually kind of sad to watch. He kept tripping over his words in a rush to get his thoughts out and he wrung his hands almost raw in anxiety. This was  the monster that was going to cut him up?

“Oh, and you’ve been in there for days without hardly even a blanket,” moaned Will dramatically. “I– Bill said you didn’t respond at all to human speech, so I just, y’know, I just figured you were more deer than– than human.”

Holy crap, was he starting to cry?

Will swiped a hand over his face and went on. “I mean, at first I didn’t really want to do it anyway, since, well, for one thing I’ve only ever done work on animals and humans felt too...familiar for me. My brother called me a wuss but I could see he didn’t seem to keen on the idea of butchering you up either so I was going to wait until I had at least checked it out myself and, well, there was also going to be a deer expert in on it as well, but as usual, that idea was pretty bad– Honestly, what was I thinking? She had a very nice personality at the time but now I realize I don’t really know if she can keep quiet as much as my brother and I.” The stream of uncertain babbling just kept tapering on and on. Dipper felt bad himself just listening to it.

“Woah, woah, wait, hang on,” Dipper finally cut in. Will stammered to a halt and hesitantly plopped down outside the cage. “You thought I couldn’t, like, comprehend human speech?”

Will paused. “Well, yeah. What else were we to think?” he asked, though not accusingly. His voice had also all-too-suddenly dropped the nervous undertone, as if he were chatting with an old friend.

“Huh.” Dipper thought about that. _No, I suppose they wouldn’t_ , he thought, remembering the blank looks that real deer had given him whenever they happened to cross paths in the woods. They didn’t have any discernable thought-processes happening in their heads. Dipper was half-deer himself (according to humans, anyway). It was a reasonable assumption to make, though he still felt it somewhat obvious that he’d have some kind of consciousness, what with the whole human-looking form going on. Nevertheless, he just took it along with everything else that was happening and decided to try and start a new plan of escape that he’d been brewing for a while now.

“So...about that light?” he tried with a hopeful gesture, though whether it was lost in the dark or not, Dipper couldn’t tell. Will jolted and immediately stood up. “Oh my goodness, yes, I’m sorry, I forgot. I’ll bring you a blanket right away as well, uh...” he trailed off again and looked at Dipper with a slightly embarrassed look. “What was your name again?”

“Dipper.”

Will got it immediately. “Oh, oh my gosh, like the Big Dipper? Aw, haha, I wish I was named after a constellation,” he said. Before Dipper could correct him and explain that it was just a nickname, though, Will had already turned around and was walking merrily back inside.

Dipper folded his ears back and told himself to relax. This was okay; he was going to get out of here. Finally. His plan was simple: to build up a trust with Will, which shouldn’t be hard since the guy seemed so open to everything. Then, once a good enough bond was established (for lack of better word), he’d guilt-trip the guy into setting him loose, and he’d finally be able to make it to Wendy’s for the season. For safety.

And now that he was being conversed with as an actual person, he could request something different than leaves and spicy chips. With a grimace, Dipper cast a glance to the discarded plastic bag that read _Doritos_ on it and shivered.

Yeah, definitely something else.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't really looked at it since I first started out on this chapter, so it might have a few unclear patches here and there, but bear with me? Again, thank you so much for reading. -PW  
> P.S. Lots of feedback really helps me write some sense into my works :)


	6. Ice breakers Pt 2

Will had soon returned to Dipper with the blanket and light as promised. What he didn’t promise to bring, though, and seemed to have done just to make things difficult, was bring his brother Bill along as well.

Dipper watched them approach through the only uncovered part of the cage. Will had his arm around Bill’s and was practically dragging him over, jabbering excitedly and pulling on his arms. But Bill didn’t seem to need any encouragement; his strides were already at full length and they crossed the backyard in record time.

“I knew it, I _knew_ it!” Bill exclaimed triumphantly. “I know lots of things, and I just _knew_ you could speak. Didn’t I tell you, Will?” he went on, turning to his brother. “I thought he’d warm up to you first, seeing as you’re as friendly as a freakin’ puppy. That’s why I told you to go out and give good old small talk a little try. Augh, this makes me so happy.” Bill leaned against the fence with his wide, eerie smile. Dipper willed himself not to recoil in disgust.

“His name is Dipper, like the constellation,” Will spoke up. He too leaned eagerly against the fence, but at least his hands weren’t up above his head and clawing into the mesh like Bill’s. The pair was so similar it was creepy. When Dipper squinted, he could see – from the lantern they were holding and by how close they were standing together – that the twins each had a faded eye: Will’s on his left and Bill’s on his right. _They’re...half blind? Both of them?_ he thought briefly. Twins were rare enough without each having such a unique quirk. _Interesting_.

“How charming,” Bill said, getting the cervitaur’s attention. “What else did you two talk about, Dipper?”

Dead, distrustful, silence.

After an awkward moment or two had passed, Will perked up. “Ah, here, move please, Bill–“ The Cipher shuffled past his brother and opened the gate quickly with a key he had produced from his pocket. Bill sucked in a breath as if he were about to stop his brother, before watching in surprise as Will was given allowance to move in with Dipper, who stayed perfectly still. He set the blanket and light down in front of the deer-boy before backing out and closing the gate again, though not yet locking it.

He spread his hands awkwardly. “Tada,” he sang quietly. Dipper paused, considering the pile. Then, entirely conscious of Bill’s unrelenting gaze, he stood up and moved to the blanket, bringing it up and wrapping it around his shoulders. He returned Bill Cipher’s challenging gaze and held it, stubbornly.

The man’s mouth twitched like he was holding back a smile.

“Hey, Will, why won’t he talk to me?” Bill asked his brother, gazing curiously at Dipper’s hooves and breaking the unofficial staring contest. Will shrugged.

“I’ll ask him. Dipper?” The cervitaur moved his look over to Will slowly. “Why won’t you talk to Bill? Did he do something wrong?”

Dipper deadpanned. Did Bill do something wrong? _Did Bill do something wrong?_ What kind of ridiculous question was that?! Of _course_ he had done something wrong. In fact, he had done _several_ somethings wrong. Bill had shot him, dragged him here, imprisoned him with no intention of letting him go and Dipper was now being asked to make polite conversation with this monster? What kind of moron did Will have to be in order to ask him a question like that?

For a moment, Dipper considered just falling mute again. It’s not like he had to be agreeable and friendly with these people. They were the ones in the err, not him. Why shouldn’t he return the favor and just ignore what they wanted from him?

But Dipper knew the gig was up. He’d already let the cat out of the bag (which was a term he had only learned last winter from Wendy). It wouldn’t do any good for him to act like he couldn’t speak when they now had the advantage of communication over him. His Dumb Dipper game was through. Now he had to bargain for his life.

“Tell me, Will. What do you think I’m feeling right now, trapped against my will for days in some freezing, lifeless prison?”

Will’s eyes got big and round. Bill’s just narrowed.

“Because I’m feeling miserable. I’m taken from my home, talked to as if I were some inanimate, lifeless... _thing_ , and now you’re just standing here in front of me, talking as if nothing is wrong? _Asking_ me if nothing is wrong?” _How stupid can you be_! he wanted to scream. It took everything he could not to let his anger boil over and rage at them through the fence. It would be so easy to just let go and use every muscle. But really, what good would that do him?

Will glanced nervously at Bill, who held up his hands. “Hey, hey, calm down Bambi-“

“It’s Dipper,” the cervitaur muttered coldly.

Bill ignored him. “Don’t take it out on us! We had no idea you could speak. You didn’t give us any sign at all that there was, y’know, anybody home.” He knocked on his forehead for emphasis. “You could’ve just spoken up at any time and we would’ve made the accommodations pronto!”

“Accommodations?” Dipper was incredulous. “You didn’t have to knock me out and chain me up. My family probably thinks I’m _dead_ by now!”

Will flinched back, as if it really seemed to strike a chord in him. Bill, on the other hand, leaned forward into the fence even more. How was that physically possible? His unnatural smile was back, too. “Family? There are more of you? How many?”

Dipper stepped back. Bill’s sudden change of attitude startled Dipper back into thinking for a moment, which allowed him to gather his feelings together. No. He wouldn’t let them get to his family. Not his uncles, not his sister, not anyone. He took a long breath, prayed for Wendy’s blessing, and spoke up.

“I’m not saying another word until you let me out. Treat me like a person, and I might just treat you like one back.”

Will immediately agreed. “I think that sounds like a wonderful id–“ Bill, however, plowed over him with a snort.

“You’d just run right back to your little forest friends. Which, actually, wouldn’t be that bad of an idea; we could just follow you back to wherever you came from and take your family, too,” Bill mused, Will looking annoyed at his interruption. But he waved his hands, brushing the idea off. “Nah, nah. You’d lead us off somewhere else, I bet. _Damn_. You’re smart.”

Dipper almost began to speak up, saying that Bill was jumping to conclusions; Dipper was most definitely _not_ the brightest bulb in the human residence. Otherwise he’d have the sense to not go out already days into hunting season. But if Dipper thought about it, it really wasn’t a bad idea. He probably _would_ just head in the opposite direction if they followed him. He might even head straight in to the denser, more magical parts of the forest, where humans struggled to pass through. Dipper blinked. This Bill guy was smarter than he looked.

Will rolled his eyes and said, “Well, we obviously can’t keep him forever. He’s not a pet. He’s a very interesting creature, I’ll admit, but we can’t exactly go putting him on leashes and taking him out for walks, Bill. He’s alive, you know.” Will poked his index finger into Bill’s forehead, who snarled and smacked his hand away impatiently.

“I know, I _know_ , already. Sheesh, since when did you get so brainy? I think I liked you better when you went along with everything I said.”

“But you know it’s true,” Will shot back, clearly more than a little annoyed now. “If you think about it, this is _basically_ human imprisonment.”

“But he shouldn’t exist,” Bill argued. “ _Doesn’t_ exist. I’m not going to debate the direct procedure of discovery of a new species with you right now, but I’m pretty sure we can do whatever we so please with some unheard-of animal from the land of Narnia.”

“ _Stop talking about me like I can’t hear you_!”

The Cipher twins paused in their squabble momentarily to glance at a seething cervitaur. “God, I’m not some stupid, senseless, _pet rock_ , okay? I’m literally no different from you other than the 'deer' part of me, or whatever. I eat like you, I talk like you, and yet I don’t see you locking your neighbors up for fun. Why can’t you understand how simple this has to be?” Dipper yelled, stamping his hoof less out of intimidation and more out of sheer frustration.

Bill suddenly drew himself up, his gaze fixed sharply on Dipper. “I’m not saying this is

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ....aaand that's that.
> 
> I dunno. I told you guys how my creative juices flow. They're not always predictable and even though yes, I like writing the story I'm working on, I'm just kinda,,stuck, I guess is the right word, on where I want to continue this to.
> 
> I posted what I had because I felt like you guys had been waiting long enough. I'm terribly sorry. Maybe I'll pick it up again. *shrugs*


End file.
